I’m a grumpy old bore.

image

Well, this evening I am the one on the right. Uh oh. Watch out, world.

So I’m sitting in on a Saturday night, and I feel like the world’s biggest bore. All of my friends are gone to the pub, but due to a combination of tiredness and a not-so-great mood, I couldn’t bring myself to go. I know I wouldn’t be any fun; I don’t have the energy for pretending to have a good time while watching people drink the wine I’d like to drink. I’m feeling a bit blah, so a pub is the worst place for me. My boyfriend is annoyed at me because I bailed out. I don’t even care. I’m fed up with everything. This whole sobriety thing is exhausting. Or maybe I’m just using it as an excuse for my bad mood. I’m gonna drink herbal tea and watch crappy telly ’til I fall asleep and hope that I wake up feeling better tomorrow.

Oh and PS: contemplating watching something called ‘Extreme Couponing’. Oh dear.

Advertisements

12 thoughts on “I’m a grumpy old bore.

  1. Art Mowle says:

    Oh dear it right πŸ™‚ Hope your feeling better soon. Just don’t leave before the miracle πŸ™‚ You’re doing great..

  2. I feel your pain. Last night my boyfriend went out to a birthday party that ended up with him going to play pool till the wee hours of the night. I was invited to all of this but I declined. I felt like you, I did (do) not want to watch people drink the beverages that I still crave during social settings. I was laying in bed resisting the urge to send him snarky evil texts all night ( a few did get away though :p ) and I was actually contemplating dumping his ass for being so inconsiderate. I was imagining learning to play the crap out of pool and become a pool shark and take all their drunk asses for all their money! I was SO bitter. Thankfully I finally fell asleep. I woke still grumpy but after my first cup of coffee I started feeling better. The boyfriend called and actually all in all I did not miss much. I saved a bunch of money and I woke with no dreaded hangover!! It’s almost 6 pm here and the boyfriend is still only getting out of bed. I did some yard work in my back yard ( I have not touched the back yard in 4 years!) It was nice to enjoy the sun, birds and the earth.

    Hang in there young one, you are going to find joy again. Even if it’s only tiny glimpses at a time.

    • Hi πŸ™‚ thanks for sharing! It suck feeling left out, doesn’t it? Even though we’ve excluded ourselves. Oh well, this too shall pass and as you say, it’s pretty great waking up hangover free and with money in my pocket πŸ™‚ I also must admit I feel slightly smug when I see others with a hangover when I’m feeling fresh πŸ™‚ tehehe. I also feel so relieved not to have to try and figure out what happened last night! We’re getting there, we just gotta keep going πŸ™‚

  3. Yes, the sobriety thing is exhausting and that’s because youre not used to it. Any new routine is challenging and a bit dificult to adjust to. But hang in there, it will get easier and easier. Woot, woot, to a hangover free sunday morning! Glad that you’re feeling better! Hugs.

    • Hi Maggie! πŸ™‚
      Thanks so much for your comment! πŸ™‚ feeling much better, you’re right, it definitely will take time to adjust! I’m looking forward to the time when I won’t have to struggle with my inner drunk person!

  4. The credits on that movie don’t roll after you lift that second pint, or glass of wine, or whatever you drink. That movie ends with you puking the next morning. That’s the thing I always try to remind myself. Regardless, as an old man I can promise you this. Nothing worth remembering happens at the pub. The older you get, the less meaningful those experiences seem.

    And, I watched a woman from the States tonight take her 17 year chip here in Shanghai. She’s now 39 years old. It can be done!

    • So true erics1100paces. For me it was only the first few drinks that were fun and exciting. After that it could easily turn into me being a dark, hateful messy drunk. The fun hardly ever lasted long, the dark episodes I will remember for a life time.

      • Ugh, I know what you mean. Really, I only enjoyed the first one or two drinks. After that it wasn’t even me drinking them. And even the thought of the dark episodes makes me feel anxious!

    • “Nothing worth remembering happens at the pub” – so true. Maybe that’s why my mind won’t allow me to waste space with my drunken memories. Maybe that’s the root of the blackouts! Love that you know someone who got sober at such a young age and is doing so well – thanks for telling me that πŸ™‚

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s