Another Day

Morning all!

Another day has arrived and I’m feeling good. Today is my day 7, it’s 7:32 am and I am lying in bed feeling kinda sleepy, but refreshed. This is new, for a Sunday morning πŸ™‚ I like it!

As I mentioned before, Saturday nights are the hardest for me. So last night I went for dinner and a movie with my boyfriend in the early evening, which was fun. I had plans to watch a film with my mother and sister afterward. He was meeting some friends of ours in the pub after we ate, and asked me would I come, but I reminded him of my plans with my family. This was absolutely no problem, and never would be, and I jumped into a cab and and went home. I did feel a slight tinge of want when I thought about them all having fun and drinking in my favourite pub, but to be honest it wasn’t a big deal and I forgot about it very quickly. Obstacle one, tick. Onto obstacle two.

So when we were all watching the film together, my mother and sister were drinking white wine. My favourite. I had mentioned earlier in the week that I didn’t plan on drinking for a while, and they didn’t offer me any wine. They don’t know how I’m feeling about my relationship with alcohol, so I couldn’t expect them to not drink around me. Well, they don’t know that I think I have ‘a problem’. Anyway, it was just fine and I didn’t feel the need to have any. I just supped on some herbal tea and didn’t think about it. By the time the film was over, I was pretty sleepy and ended up going to bed shortly after. All in all a nice evening, and I found it easy to navigate. I didn’t want to drink, and for once both my drunk and sober brain were on the same page. Fantastic.

I definitely think it helps that I mentioned to my family and my boyfriend that I don’t want to drink anymore. I said that I’m just sick of it, and how it makes me feel. They completely understand and it doesn’t seem to be a big deal, or any deal at all to them. They know that I’ve felt like this for some time, as I’ve shared how anxious and depressed I feel after a ‘big night out’. I haven’t mentioned the blackouts, just kind of referred to them, because I don’t want to frighten them. But I’ve told them enough. So now that they’re not expecting me to drink, it’s another barrier to my drinking, as I’ll have to explain myself if I do decide to. Which I don’t want to do. As I read here before, nothing bad ever came of not drinking. And, more to the point, I have never ever in my life woken up and wished I’d drank the night before. That’s something I’ll have to remember.

Wishing you all a happy Sunday!


15 thoughts on “Another Day

  1. Congrats on another day of sobriety! I’ve had so many of the same feelings, and it’s nice to relate to your experiences. I really enjoyed “nothing bad ever came of not drinking. And, more to the point, I have never ever in my life woken up and wished I’d drank the night before. That’s something I’ll have to remember.” It’s similar to a mantra that I say to myself. “I’ve gained nothing from drinking, but I’ve lost so much.” Thank you for sharing your journey!

    • Hi partygirlgonesober!
      Thanks for your comment πŸ™‚ it makes me feel better to know that someone can relate to where I am, particularly when nobody seems to think I have a problem in my real life. I know it’s real now. I also love your mantra, and will be adding it to my list for future use. I’ve just started following you and am looking forward to hearing about your journey, I thought I had pressed follow after I read your post yesterday but I am still getting the hang of this thing! The part where you said “Great. How does a 27 year old woman find herself in an unfamiliar home, with no memory of hours of her life AND no shoes? Alcoholism” made me think “yep, she said exactly what I’ve been thinking so it must be true”. But we can do this πŸ™‚ thanks again for the support πŸ™‚

    • It’s crazy isn’t it? Some people just “don’t get them”. I don’t understand how. I have blacked out after 3 glasses of wine. I’ve also blacked out after far more than 3 glasses, but I don’t understand how people who have more than 5 drinks don’t black out. I guess peoples’ bodies react differently. One of my friends throws up without fail every time she drinks. I have never thrown up from drinking, I absolutely hate being sick, and have said in the past that I wouldn’t drink if it made me sick. But ruining my personal life is a-okay. Sorry about the rant – your post struck a chord πŸ™‚

  2. graysgrogblog says:

    Nice going, yfsm!
    All things considered, some good, positive stuff like this is exactly what I needed this morning!
    You seem to be doing a darned good job so far… Keep it up and keep us up to date! :o)
    G x

    • I’m glad this helped your spirits πŸ™‚ I’m finding blogging very therapeutic, so you’ll most likely be hearing quite a bit more from me πŸ™‚ take care and thanks for the support πŸ™‚

  3. graysgrogblog says:

    ‘Tis true that it’s therapeutic……. I get “carried away” and “on a roll” sometimes, hence the length of some of my posts! ;o)

  4. Loved your blog – thanks so much for sharing. It all makes perfect sense to fellow problem drinkers (this one with more than a good dose of Irish too!). Look forward to continuing to read about your journey. Stay strong.

  5. Congratulations on your accomplishments. I recollect that my relatives and friends and everyone said I could not possibly be an alcoholic because I had never gotten a DUI, wasn’t homeless, and all of those other stereotypes. However, I could no longer handle the blackouts, the mental and physical deterioration, and on and on. I recollect so well being 7 days sober on a Saturday night at about 11:30 PM and thinking I had not done that before in many many years. I have been sober now since 1984 – the best decision I ever made.

    Best wishes as you live into your sobriety!

    • Hi Robert!

      Thank you so much for your comment. I really get what you mean when you say that everyone said that you couldn’t possibly be an alcoholic. I swear, my friends and family would probably laugh at me if I suggested it to them! As luckily the only person I’m affecting so far is myself, and I’ve definitely noticed my problem is worsening, so feck them, I know something is definitely wrong here. 1984 – wow!!!!! That is amazing. That gives me hope. Congratulations on an achievement that so many of us can only dream of. Thanks so much for sharing πŸ™‚

    • Thank you so much! Feeling like you’re really ready now and being back on day 1 is better than feeling tortured about whether or not you’ve made the right decision. I’ve been back to day 1 so many times! Sometimes we just need to go back and see how much we aren’t missing out on to give us the confirmation that we need!

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